Finding a Therapist
The process of finding a “therapist” can be overwhelming. Even the term “therapist” is unclear — many different professionals are licensed to provide therapy. (You should avoid anyone offering therapy who does not have a professional license.)
By breaking the process down into several steps, and explaining terminology, we hope to facilitate your search for a qualified therapist who is right for you. (Note: If you are experiencing a life-threatening crisis and need immediate help, call 911, go to your nearest emergency room or call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.)
Do you need therapy? Therapy can be useful for many different situations. Although it is often thought of as something to turn to during a crisis, a therapist can help you sort through life transitions, relationship issues and important decisions. A common misconception is that a therapist is there to solve your problems; in fact, a good therapist will guide you to solving your own problems. Therapists have obvious advantages over friends: they are not biased, it may be easier for you to be completely honest, and they are trained professionals.
How do I find a therapist? A therapist is not someone you want to choose from the Yellow Pages, or a Google search. You want a vetted therapist. You can ask friends for recommendations; your primary doctor may be able to make recommendations; and your insurance company likely provides a network of mental health practitioners. You may also have an employee assistance program at work that connects you with an appropriate provider. We at Pelham Together have asked local residents to recommend providers with whom they have had a good experience; we then verified each provider’s credentials and contacted them directly to provide certain basic information about their practice. You will find these providers listed on our website.
How do I know whether someone is a “good” therapist? This is complicated. The most obvious criterion is that the provider is licensed. Also, therapists may have either a website of their own, or a page on Psychology Today or a similar aggregate site. This will provide information about their education and training; while you may not be familiar with all of the terminology, this information will help you to evaluate the provider’s experience. If you are taking a recommendation, if possible, ask the person making the recommendation what they liked about the provider and why they considered the therapy successful. And keep in mind that the therapy relationship is very personal, so that even if a therapist comes highly recommended, they may not be a fit for you.
Is this provider a good fit for you? Ask the person who recommended this provider what in particular they liked about him/her. But remember that you may be dealing with very different issues or you may have different priorities. Take that into account when getting recommendations. And trust your gut — review the provider’s online profile carefully and make sure you feel comfortable with the information available to you.
Which type of therapist should I see? There are several licenses that allow a practitioner to provide mental health services in New York State. These include psychiatrists, nurse practitioners, psychologists, social workers, mental health counselors and marriage and family therapists. One important factor is whether you need or want medication; you may not know the answer to this question as you start this process, and that is okay. You can start by seeing any type of mental health provider, and they can refer you to a prescriber if needed. Only psychiatrists (and other medical doctors) and nurse practitioners can prescribe medication. And although psychiatrists can also provide talk therapy, their fees are relatively high; as a result, many consumers choose to see a separate provider for talk therapy. For more information on the different types of therapists, see this guide from the National Alliance on Mental Illness.
And then there is the issue of cost. Unfortunately, the issue of fees and insurance coverage complicates this process significantly — unless you can afford to pay out of pocket without a second thought. Insurance companies are required to cover mental health to some degree, but because they often reimburse providers at a very low rate, their “in network” providers are usually not among the most experienced or well-regarded. As a result, many people opt to go “out of network,” believing that they will obtain better results in a shorter time by paying more out-of-pocket. We know that not everyone has this option; therefore, we have researched other options that make therapy more affordable.
Think in terms of value. While many people complain about therapists’ high hourly fees, you rarely hear someone talk frankly about the monetary value of therapy. Yes, therapists charge anywhere from $100 to $400 and up per hour in the New York City area. But they also help their clients achieve life-changing results, whether recovering from a trauma, repairing a broken relationship, identifying a new career path, salvaging their marriages or ending crippling anxiety, to name just a few examples. If you choose a therapist who is a good fit for you, and commit to working on your issues, you’re likely to look back and think the money was well spent.
The initial phone call. Maximize your contact with the provider prior to a consultation. We recommend that you contact them by phone, even if email is an option. This gives you an opportunity to try out the relationship, to see how comfortable you are talking with this person. Pay attention to any negative feelings you have during this brief phase, as they may signal problems you’ll have in feeling safe and/or heard during your therapy.
Your initial session. Expect this session to require a lot of energy. You’re finding your way to a new place to meet a near-stranger and to talk to them about very personal issues. Typically, you will provide an abbreviated history of your emotional life — the highs and lows — and a more detailed explanation of your current social, emotional and work life. Given the investment — of time, money and energy — you’ll want to have been deliberate about choosing the therapist. Do not expect any great insights or problem resolution during this first session. Good therapy requires establishing a trusting relationship before the real work can happen. Try not to become frustrated with the slow start-up; once you develop a relationship with a therapist, there will likely be times when you can return to therapy for a session or two for help with a discrete issue.
What’s next? Hopefully, you felt safe and heard during your initial session and feel optimistic that this therapist will help you effectively address your identified problem. If so, you will work with the therapist to decide how often and when you will meet in the future. If you do not feel that the therapist was a good fit for you, then you need to decide whether to invest time and money with additional sessions, or whether to start fresh with a new therapist. Try not to get discouraged if the therapist does not feel like a good fit. We at Pelham Together have a lot of experience in trying out therapists, and can assure you that good therapy is well worth all of the effort you invest!
For more information, we recommend the book Find Your Therapy: A Practical Guide to Finding Quality Therapy 2nd Edition, by Nick Wignall, a 183-page book available on Kindle and in paperback. This book is written in simple, straightforward language and expands on the ideas above.
For a list of service providers in the lower Westchester area, click this link to see a list of area service providers.