Allyson Pereira was a “good girl” who started dating a boy in high school and thought her life was perfect. Until he broke up with her, but then asked her to send a nude photo with a promise to get back together. She made a bad choice, as happens to many people, and she sent the photo. Her life was forever changed. She came to discuss her experiences with current 7th and 8th grade students during the school day, and the Pelham parent community in the evening.

What ensued after Allyson sent that photo was a endless ordeal involving loss of friends, bullying and harassment from adults and kids alike, and depression. The photo went viral, forwarded to what seemed like everyone in town. She eventually told her parents what had happened, however, the laws in New Jersey were such that Allyson could have been convicted of distributing child pornography because she sent the photo initially, so her family felt unable to go to the authorities for help. Her high school life was torturous, but with support from her family and counseling, she has channeled that experience into becoming a lifelong advocate for awareness around sexting and cyberbullying.

In addition to working with elected officials to make it easier for people to report the broader distribution of nude photos, she speaks to students to share her story. For those who may have made similar mistakes, she has become a beacon of hope. For those who have not, she is a painful reminder of why one should not send nude, or otherwise compromising, photos. And laws in many states have not changed, or, are inconsistently enforced. While there are many in law enforcement who see the initial sender as a kid making a bad choice and wanting to help, there are still restrictions in place that tie the hands of those in positions to help.

Allyson presented to parents the same evening she met with 7th and 8th graders during the day, hoping that families could have informed and suppprtive conversations around these issue. During the evening Q&A, Allyson shared with parents what her key piece of advice was to their students that day—tell an adult if you’re ever in this situation so you can get the support you need and deserve. Her message was clear—an open line of communication about all aspects of this issue is critical so that young people know they can talk about it and get the help they need. Principal Lynn Sabia was on hand at the parent session to address questions.